Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens . . .

So far, nobody is shocked when I explain to them that I wrote my thesis on education based from the standpoint of a critical theorist. That means that I studied power, and the reinforcement of social power structures particularily how university gives them strength. Not that I expect many people to enjoy that type of thing, but I love it; I love to ask, "who has the power in this situation, and why?"

A book that fueled this interest long before my senior seminar was "Brave New World" by Aldous Huxley. The story involves a drug called Soma, which was to be taken at the slightest hint of any unpleasant emotion, to prevent worse feelings from happening. It also involved random sexual encounters and super-experiential movies called "feelies". Frankly, the whole book featured lifestyles that no self-respecting person should ever try to replicate, but as a whole, it offered an idea that has stuck with me:

If you want to control people, just try to keep them happy.

Think about it,
nobody wants to usurp a leader
who gives them
chocolate doughnuts and puppies,
right?

Consider drugs, fast food, theme parks, pets and clowns. Relationships, parties, vacations and slinkies all amount to nothing more than attempts to help people get their hands on some joy or maybe kill some pain. Unless they suffer from some sort of drama disorder or mental illness, people take certain actions and inflict themselves with jobs, hoping that the return will contribute to their joy more than the cost of the commitment detracted from it.

What is it about joy, happiness and fun that's so appealing? Why would we allow ourselves to be controlled for the sake of happiness? Duh, Jake- because it's fun. True, but when you think about it, I believe that we were made for fun and joy. God didn't make us for the purpose of experiencing pain, a huge part of it started when the fall happened. When those ridiculous two people who had it all AND got to run around naked threw it away for a piece of fruit.

We try to experience happiness as an attempt to get back to that place where original creation lived. Our steps have deviated from theirs because of sin which opened the door to pain. In spite of it all though, we do what we do trying to get back to that place where we ought to be. We try to be happy. We'll follow whatever makes us happy and reflect upon it with some level of affection, regardless of goodness, or the lack thereof.

Well obviously, all the slinkies and chocolate doughnuts in the world couldn't get us back to that place. Neither could all the drugs, free time or anything else like that. The big difference between now and then is the relationship that original creation had with God.

That's what we should strive for, because the rest of it will only try to control you.

On Making Idols

Bodies popped and writhed. A few bounced. Colored light flashed, swept and danced as it was caught midair by thick smoke. Bass rumbled from giant speakers. Wall-flowers watched, conversed and sucked on cigarettes. Others ordered drinks at the bar.

The bar tender handed them their beers. The man and his friend turned around to look at the dance floor. They searched for women that looked like fun. Their eyes swept the crowd and made judgments on each.

"Taken, too tall, too big, too loud. . . Look at her little hands! That's weird.
Wait. There's the one.

I'd like to hit that."

Who hasn't been in that place? You might not have said those exact words, probably weren't in a dance club because everyone knows that most of them fester with disease on a nightly basis and frankly, that's unfortunate as well as disgusting, but we've all been in a similar situation. We've all looked at someone or something for what we can get out of them. Did we care about anything else? Perhaps not. If we only look at things for what we can get out of them, there might be a little bit of idolatry in it.

You can be sure that using people or religion or things
just for what you can get out of them-
the usual variations on idolatry-
will get you nowhere,
and certainly nowhere near the kingdom of Christ,
the kingdom of God. ( Eph. 5:5 )

In Exodus 32, Aaron and the people created the golden calf because Moses hadn't come down the mountain yet. They were lacking the leader who had acted as their tie to God and brought them out into the wilderness. They had a need that wasn't being met, and that was the result.

We make idols to fill needs and desires. The fertility gods of the Old Testament didn't truly offer fruitfulness (it certainly was a bi-product) , they gave people a chance to have sex. If you study some of the pagan practices mentioned in the Testament, you'll discover that not only were sexual rituals common, but infant sacrifice followed! People wanted to "get down" and didn't want the result, so since the former found resolve in "religion" lets take care of the latter in the same fashion.

I know that we've had our spiritual revelation, followed by several revolutions of the same sort but it doesn't make it any different for us! When we seek God for money, friends, comfort or whatever, without taking any time to get to know Him first, our actions are no different than some guy who decides that he wants to "hit that" in reference to some girl that just walked past him at a bar.

Effectually then, we make God into an idol. Not that He becomes a powerless block of wood or stone collecting dust on our mantle at home, but rather, He has become a meaningless vending machine of goodness to idiots who don't deserve it.

I know I've been one of those idiots. I've simply prayed for things with no "Hi" or "Goodbye", not to mention any notion of gratitude. I'll probably do it again because frankly, I sometimes suck at life, but that won't keep me from thinking about God, and trying to enjoy Him as a friend above and beyond anything else.

Dusty Feet and Disappointment

His words made me slip. The knife sliced through the tomato and continued right into my hand. Somehow, the throbbing in my flesh felt better than the emotional pain that had just been inflicted. The knife met the meat of my palm, but instead of stopping, (simply because it was supposed to) it continued on, through layers of skin, into muscle. A straight line clearly separated the two halves of my hand before the blood began seep out and make a mess of things. I cursed inside, just a little.

I looked up to him. Wouldn't have minded being like him someday. He had so many qualities and said so many things that I would have loved to have attributed to myself. He built my self-esteem up when it was at a zero. He taught me about life, God and friends and now, he was making the decision to pull out of my life. "Things weren't just the same" he said.

* * *

The disciples kicked dust and rocks as they trudged to their destination. Their sandals felt thinner than before. Their shoulders heavier. They felt like they had given so much to follow that Jesus, and now He was dead. If He wasn't alive, then how could they believe a word He said? He said some wonderful things, too. That hurt almost as much as his crucifixion did for them. Their defeat was a crushing blow to what they believed would be a new way of life. What a letdown. (Luke 24)

* * *

I didn't know if it was worse that I was losing a friend and mentor, or if I now doubted every encouraging word he ever offered me. He was one of those guys who, if he complimented you, it meant something special. It made you feel valuable. He had experience, and knew people. What did that say about you? Did he mean any of it? Probably not if he could just leave like this.

* * *

Fortunately, Jesus showed up as they continued to walk. He encountered them in the middle of their disappointment. He allowed them to talk, to share their grief, then revealed Himself to them. Imagine their joy, the immediate dissipation of overwhelming grief by the One you miss the most beats any other solution or condolence offered by any other individual. Nothing can top that.

It was even better that it was the savior. Who cared that they saw him nailed to a cross not long ago? He was here now, and that meant everything would be alright.

* * *

That said, I had to realize that my friend couldn't function as my savior. Good thing too, because he's not back. The situation didn't change, and he's still out of my life. Fortunately, I haven't lost my salvation, or the way of life that I have chosen to follow. I still doubt some of the things said to me, but then again, grief will do that do you. Especially when heroes choose to die.


** This was written for the Blog Carnival that Peter Pollock so nicely puts together. Check it out. There are a bunch of seriously amazing writers involved!

It's Actually Quite Simple

Saturday morning! I scrambled out of bed and scampered to the living room. I threw all forty-five pounds of my six-year-old self into my father's recliner with enough force that it tipped, smacked the wall behind, then flopped down to its original, level position. Whino, my Australian Shepherd teetered out to me and dropped himself down at the foot of the chair. The end table next to us provided the remote to the television. One click turned it on, the next brought me to my Saturday morning cartoons. I lied there for the next couple of hours, pet my dog and indulged in animated bliss.

I haven't seen it in a while, but I recall one particular episode of a cartoon that involved tying a mouse up and taking her to a volcano to be thrown in. The narrative included natives on some island, and of course they were trying to placate some cantankerous deity thus preventing the volcanic demise of this little animated community.

It was a cartoon. I had no notion of what sacrifice meant at six years old. I had no idea that sometimes when something scared you, it meant that you had to do something to fix it. I had no idea there was a god. The tiki-looking characters in a cartoon held no relevance to my life at all! How often though, do we find ourselves subject to a situation, bowing down, trying to make something ghetto work? How often are we throwing something we love to the lava?

I'm ridiculous. In fact, the foundation of my theological understanding is that we (the entire bloody human race) suck at life. Truly we do. If you were to ask me, I could give you a detailed outline of all the ways that I failed TODAY. It isn't difficult to know that I'm a contentious bad word who doesn't deserve half of what I have. I yell at people, say mean things about them, am a little selfish, and also. . . I think too highly of myself (C'mon! I'm good looking and smart). Just reading that, half of you rolled your eyes and the other half thought, "I doubt that." OR "You're also short."

What do we do when we gain this understanding? Do we go all Will Smith in "Seven Pounds" to try to make things better? I certainly hope not, because that made me want to swear, and I even like jelly fish! Here's the great thing about life, we suck at it and we have a way out of it! Jesus offered something so amazing, so wonderful, so not requiring us to cut goats, bulls, doves or ourselves apart, something that puts us on His good side!

The best way to be on God's good side is to enjoy Him like a friend. That's right, I don't have to tie anyone up (obviously) against their will and toss them into a volcano, they don't need cement shoes to pull them to the bottom of a river, and I don't have to do it to myself because God loves me. I wouldn't worship a God who I thought was a pig. Think about it. I suppose if I was entirely reliant on Him, that might make a difference, but I'd still resent it if He was a jerk.

That means that I'm free to be a human. I can enjoy amazing food, I can listen to awesome music, read great books, have wonderful conversations, tell bloody hilarious stories and sleep. God expects that, because that's what He made. Of course, there are rules of engagement for pleasures, like sex, but truthfully, when you start breaking some of those, you might get herpes, or if it's something like food, you may get sick (and probably die) so those rules make sense and I'm OK keeping them.

Life is good.

Because I'm loved by the only one that matters, as well as a bunch of people who ultimately don't, but who certainly come about as an added bonus. The great part is that I don't have to earn His love like I might theirs (don't lie, some of you only like me because my attitude makes you feel better about yourself- mostly kidding).

John 3:16 | Galatians 2:20 | 1 John 4:19-20 | Romans 8:38-39